


Virgil's Hanahaki

by LiamLogan



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Hanahaki Disease, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, analogical - Freeform, hanahaki
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-26
Updated: 2019-07-26
Packaged: 2020-07-20 04:54:50
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,060
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19986442
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LiamLogan/pseuds/LiamLogan
Summary: As if being plagued by an unrequited love was not painful enough, Virgil is also plagued by the Hanahaki Disease. As more and more flowers take root in his lungs, Logan grows more and more concerned, unaware that he may be the root of Virgil's pain.





	Virgil's Hanahaki

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this for my friend, K, who does not have an AO3 account but gave me the inspiration for this work. If you're reading this (which you should be, I sent you the link), I hope you enjoy!  
> I can't think of many triggers, but there is some swearing and reference to knives.

It started as just a generic tickle, a prickling of the chest that came with any cough, but as time went on, it evolved into an uncontrollable itch that could make Virgil’s breathing cease. Still, he was brushing it off as nothing he wouldn’t get over. When Logan had caught him one day as he was on the verge of passing out, however, he realised what was happening; the Hanahaki had taken over his lungs, and flowers must have already started to take root. He didn’t even have to think about it, he knew he was doomed.

Logan had never been the affectionate type, nor even someone to feel love, nor really anything, so Virgil loving him would cause nothing but agony. He would eventually succumb to the flowers growing in his chest for his unrequited love, and could only take solace in the fact that when he died, it would be a beautiful sight to see his flowers bloom – beautiful for everyone but him.

“What am I thinking?” He muttered to himself, alone in his room, “I’m not even real, I won’t die from this.”

“It is _just_ a cough, Virgil, you wouldn’t die even if you actually were more than a metaphysical portrayal of Thomas’s anxiety.” Said Logan having just teleported into Virgil’s room unexpected.

“Oh, Logan!” Virgil felt himself blush, and his chest felt like it was about to burst. He started coughing uncontrollably again, cursing himself for being so easily flustered in Logan’s presence.

“Although,” Logan considered, “it does seem detrimental to your performance, maybe you should take a break for a short while to recover. Self-care never hurts.”

“Yeah, sure! Okay! Sounds good!” Virgil feigned enthusiasm so as not to rouse suspicion, but knew by the flick of Logan’s eyebrow that he had failed.

“To diverge: I apologise for interrupting you, I hope my appearance wasn’t too distressing.” And with that, he disappeared. Frantically, Virgil clicked his fingers and, as he’d hoped, Deceit appeared in front of him like magic. He stumbled, but caught himself on the corner of Virgil’s desk.

“Virgil, please, warn me before summoning me! Are you feeling any better?” Deceit’s tone was one of annoyance, but Virgil could tell that he cared. He just could.

“No, but could you please do something for me?”

“That depends on what you want.”

“You know about me and Logan, don’t you?” He asked, lowering his voice in case Logan could hear. He was sure he couldn’t, but didn’t want to take any risks.

“Everyone knows you’re suffering with an unrequited love except for him – don’t ask me to make him think he loves you back, because even if I did, it wouldn’t work.”

“Yeah, thanks for that, but no… I want you to help me hide it from him. I just, I don’t know, I don’t want him knowing how I feel. I won’t die, but something will happen, right? Surely? If he finds out, he will blame himself, and I don’t want that.”

“That’s selfless of you, Virgil. Sure, that won’t be a problem.”

In his room, Logan assiduously studied all his books about human disease, searching for something in every line for something that could relate to Virgil, but his attempts were so overly fruitful that they were essentially fruitless; ‘sudden cough and chest pain’ was not very much to go on, and there were so many possibilities that he simply could not narrow down. He slammed his hands on his desk in frustration. He flicked his hand to summon Roman, who appeared smoothly.

“Hey nerd, what’s up?” He asked, seeing Logan with his hands over his face and his glasses resting on his forehead. He sighed before answering.

“Do you have any idea what could be wrong with Virgil? He’s been coughing like a wreck for weeks now, it’s starting to effect Thomas.”

“How is it affecting him? I haven’t seen any impact, personally.” Roman, naturally, knew about the Hanahaki, but couldn’t tell Logan, because, of course, he would blame himself.

“Well, he hasn’t been sticking to the schedule I arranged. He was doing so well, but without his anxiety to push him, he’s started to slack, he’s no longer feeling the effects of negative reinforcement and it’s because Virgil’s cough has caused him to under-perform!”

“So you care about the fact that Thomas isn’t sticking to your schedule more than you care about Virgil’s wellbeing?”

“You don’t understand: in caring for Thomas, I care for all of us, too. Obviously I worry for Virgil, otherwise I would neglect his wellbeing and not be trying to help him. All I asked was what you think could be wrong with him, and with your input, we could maybe try to help him.”

“Well, you seem to be focussing on real diseases…” Roman said, observing the myriad of books on human biology and pathology, “I mean, it’s not like we’re real humans, so maybe divert from that and maybe mythical diseases?”

“I don’t have any books on those!” Logan protested, pulling at his hair in annoyance.

“We’re not real.”

“Oh, of course.” He raised his hand to his bookshelf, and immediately a book of mythical illnesses flew into it. He examined it, and just as he was going to ask Roman for more of his insight, he disappeared just as he had arrived. Logan could only think he had been summoned elsewhere.

In Deceit’s room, Roman was about to topple over before being caught by Deceit, whose grip disappeared promptly. His room was dark with a faint yellow glow, barely enough to see, but Roman knew this room well.

“Wow, I’m so popular today, what makes you want me?” He asked. He couldn’t see Deceit, but knew he was there.

“I’m in dire need of your help…” He whispered from the shadows. “Correction: _Virgil_ is in dire need of your help. You know his situation, correct?”

“Everyone knows his situation except for Logan, which I guess is part of the problem.”

“Indeed; I implore you to teach him to make Logan love him.”

“Woah, you want me to what?”

“Did I stutter?” His voice had moved around, but Roman still couldn’t identify where he was.

“Can’t you make Logan love him?”

“I can make Logan _think_ he loves him, but that will not suffice. You’re a charmer, if you talk to Virgil, you might be able to teach him your ways.”

“You have to understand, Deceit,” said Roman, circling a spot that he thought was around Deceit, “that Logan thinks I’m an insufferable dumbass and, furthermore, he is practically immune to anything I could teach Virgil, so I’m afraid I’m not of use here.” He made to leave, but just as he got to the door, he felt a firm grip on his shoulder once more.

“He’s dying, Roman. Please try.” He said.

“He can’t die, he isn’t real.” Deceit scoffed at Roman’s words, before releasing him and pushing him out the door.

“Just you wait.”

Virgil had resorted to lying in bed as every movement made his chest burn and erupt in pain. Every breath was lost to a cough.

“Roman? What are you doing here?” He managed to splutter out when he saw Roman appear, casually waltzing around his room as if it were his own, not looking in Virgil’s direction. Roman tried to ignore the roots and petals around the room, knowing that if he payed them too much heed, it would only upset Virgil, and he was suffering too much already. He didn’t look at him; seeing him in such a state brought tears to his eyes.

“I didn’t know it was this bad.” He said, levelling his voice as Virgil choked once more, spluttering rose petals out of his mouth.

“It got bad quickly.”

“It’s okay, don’t worry,” his words were more a comfort to himself than to Virgil, he wasn’t sure if Virgil even wanted to hear them, “Logan is trying to help you, he’s researching everything imaginable.”

“No!” Virgil shot up out of bed, but his knees gave way. Roman darted to catch him, but rather than getting up and sliding back amongst the sheets, he seemed unable to bear his own weight anymore. Roman held him there as Virgil clung to his arms.

“Does he know?” He squeaked between more coughs and more flower petals. His chest was in agony after such extreme exertion.

“No, he doesn’t know about these flowers, he doesn’t know about the Hanahaki either, I didn’t want to tell him about it, it felt like your right.”

“Good. I’d rather live a hundred years like this than for him to even for a moment take the blame.” He was already so short of breath that crying could do nothing but send him through more terrible pain, but that didn’t stop the tears falling.

He wasn’t summoned to Logan’s room, but Patton entered anyway, knowing that it was a dangerous move to show up uninvited in such circumstances.

“Patton!” Logan exclaimed, leaping out of his chair.

“Logan? I was just checking up on you to make sure you were doing okay!”

“Do you have any news regarding Virgil?” As he spoke, he approached Patton, who noticed a terrified glint in his eyes and dark circles of exhaustion.

“I just wanted to see how you were holding up…”

“I’m figuratively filled with –” he stopped to clear his throat before he could finish his sentence (before he could admit to his worries) “I’m a little tired, what about yourself?”

“Concerned, for both you and Virgil… You might want to go see him.” Patton’s voice was shaky. Logan tried not to let that disconcert him as he made his way to Virgil’s room, Patton by his side.

“What the fuck has happened here?” Exclaimed Logan as he entered Virgil’s room, repulsed by all the flower petals and roots and leaves scattered around Virgil, who had been moved back to bed by Roman. He was sat on a stool next to the bed, stroking Virgil’s hair as he coughed out more petals, and sobbed in pain.

“Logan…” Virgil tried to speak but his voice was weak, his airflow being obstructed by the firmly-planted flowers in his lungs, with the roots spreading up his windpipe and slowly strangling his vocal cords.

“It’s okay, Virgil, I’ll do the talking.” Said Roman. Logan looked at the petals in horror.

“Did he just cough those out?” He asked, his fingers shaking as he held one.

“He’s been doing it for a while.” Replied Patton.

“And you all knew? Why didn’t I?”

“Virgil didn’t want to tell you.”

“Why me, specifically? What is happening?” He grew quickly frustrated as his glasses steamed up by the heat of the room (the cold just hurt Virgil more).

“Have you heard of the Hanahaki?” Asked Roman.

“The Hanahaki? When someone in love with someone who doesn’t love them back grows flowers in their lungs? No way. I do not believe this for a moment.”

“Well how else would you explain the fact that Virgil is _literally_ coughing petals and leaves up alongside his own blood? We couldn’t make this shit up if we tried!” Roman bellowed, standing up from his chair.

“With whom is he in love, then? Which of you _fools_ doesn’t love him back?” The pain in Virgil’s chest eased up just slightly.

“Logan…” Patton tried to explain, but his voice was meek.

“You’re so oblivious sometimes, you know that, right?” Interjected Roman as he had quickly grown impatient. The figurative penny dropped for Logan, and his blood seemed to run cold, and he turned white.

“Excuse me.” He fled the room without another thought.

The next day, Thomas awoke with a strange, indescribable feeling. Even though he had very little conflict to warrant them, Patton and Roman made themselves visible in his living room.

“Hey, guys, where is everyone else?” He asked upon their arrival. The two glanced at each other nervously before continuing.

“Long story short, we’re going to have to work real hard today to keep you on track, so just trust us, okay?” Patton explained.

“Indeed, but everything will be fine.”

“I am almost surprised by how okay I am with that.” Replied Thomas. The two sides shared the same thought: if Thomas felt no anxiety about it, it meant he was no longer getting Virgil’s effects, and if he was okay about that, it meant he was no longer getting Logan’s effects either.

Logan watched from his room as Roman and Patton tried to keep Thomas on his strict schedule and, more importantly, keep him safe. Several times Thomas had picked up a knife and, with no anxiety or logic to stop him, nearly threw it across the room in the name of ‘freestyle architectural acupuncture’. He clicked his fingers to summon Deceit.

“I hate to bother you, but may you do something for me, please?” He asked upon hearing him appear behind him.

“Depends what it is.”

“Tell Remus to shut the fuck up and stop telling Thomas to throw knives.”

“Your permission to do so is an honour,” he smiled, “but why can’t you do that? It seems like something you’d also take great satisfaction in.”

“I fear that if I leave my room, Virgil may not recover from his feelings, so I have isolated myself here in the hopes he may get over me and no longer be in pain.” He replied. Virgil heard this all the way from his room, and his chest loosened up just enough to breathe without choking in flowers.

“And is that why you’ve resigned yourself to wallowing in self-pity also, rather than being with Roman and Patton to assist Thomas?”

“Yes, actually. Now go tell Remus to leave him alone.”

“Remus, buddy, please leave Thomas alone, everyone’s having a rough time.”

“Make me, _thot_!”

What a satisfying punch.

As the day drew to a close, with Roman and Patton having tempted Thomas back to bed to go on his phone where he’d be safe, they retreated back into the mind-palace, and into Virgil’s room. They were surprised to see that, not only was he awake still, but sat up reading a book, rather than quivering amongst a botanical mess.

“Virgil?” They both exclaimed in shock.

“Oh, hey guys.” He coughed, but only slightly, and only a single petal fluttering out, rather than a cloud of them.

“Are you feeling okay?”

“Well, definitely better, but…” He choked once more, this time uncontrollably, as his chest vacillated between being excruciatingly tight and comfortingly soft, as if the flowers were dying but regenerating just as quickly.

“Virgil?”

“Help me…” He cried.

Logan wrestled with his feelings and tried to suppress whatever they could be. Any emotion was greatly distressing, but this was something different, but he couldn’t tell what. He pulled at his hair and rubbed his wrists to stay focussed, but he heard the crying from Virgil’s room, and stopped; he stopped his inward fighting, stopped his suppression, and stopped his own thinking. He heard the crying slowly calm down, and even heard some heavy breaths coming from his room. As Logan allowed himself to feel, he heard more and more breathing from Virgil, and even his voice.

“I have no idea what just happened to me.” He said.

“How do you feel?” Asked Patton.

“Painless, almost?”

“You got over that quickly, damn.” Interjected Roman. Logan desperately wanted to join them, to see Virgil’s face without his pain, but he was paralysed in fear, expecting that, if Virgil saw him again, the Hanahaki would seize him once more.

“I… I didn’t. I’m still thinking of him, and still…” As Logan listened in, another figurative penny dropped: feelings, the usual bane of his existence, may have relieved Virgil from his pain. He let himself feel. He thought of Virgil, and didn’t banish any emotion. As suddenly as he’d realised what had just occurred, the scenery of his room vanished, replaced by that of Virgil’s. He looked around, but Roman and Patton were nowhere to be seen.

“Those bastards.” Muttered Virgil.

“Sorry?”

“They summoned you here and then teleported away, it was as if they’d planned it.”

“I can guarantee that they did not plan it; I most certainly didn’t plan this.”

“So do you believe in the Hanahaki now?” Smiled Virgil, gesturing to the plethora of petals scattered on the floor.

“I suppose I may have to, at least in your case.” Logan conceded. “Are you definitely feeling okay?”

“Should I be? The Hanahaki only applies to _unrequited_ love.”

“In which case, if it truly is me, you should be okay.” Virgil smiled, and Logan felt himself blushing. “I should apologise, too; if I hadn’t been adamant on not feeling anything, much of this may have been avoided. If I had let myself reciprocate your feelings, you would not have suffered as you did. I express my sincerest apologies.”

“You can make up for it by kissing me.”

“I’m sorry, what?”

“A hug will do.”

“You can get a handshake.” Compromised Logan. Virgil teleported in front of him (Logan refrained from commenting on the short distance he’d have had to travel) and reached out his hand. Logan looked at it thoughtfully. He took it, shook it once, before pulling Virgil into a tight embrace. After several seconds, Virgil pulled away, but Logan pulled him back into a forehead kiss.

“Oh, wow, thank you, I didn’t think I’d even get a handshake!” Virgil laughed.

“Quite honestly, you deserve as many handshakes as you want.” Logan replied, trying to supress the butterflies, then realising what he was doing, and smiling when he heard Virgil laugh.

“Hey, thanks, I’m grateful you even let yourself feel. That’s enough, if that’s all you can take.”

The next day, both Virgil and Logan appeared to help Thomas navigate the day. The cheer he expressed upon their arrival brought joy to them both. It seemed a mutual agreement not to mention anything about the Hanahaki to Thomas, and definitely not to mention Logan’s new-found cheer and love with his recent ability to feel. Once Virgil had told him that feeling emotions was the only thing Logan wasn’t good at, he amended it immediately by feeling so much more. It had hurt at first, but soon he had grown to love almost anything, but nothing more so than Virgil.


End file.
